Thursday, June 9, 2011

Self-Loathing Pt. 2 -- How to Enjoy Bible Spinach

I just finished watching Julie and Julia.  I’ve seen it twice.  The first time I saw it, I went through a wanting-to-cook-like-a-gourmet phase.  It didn't last long.  My obsessions are usually short-lived, but there are exceptions.
 
For instance, I love to write.  I rattle off a thousand words without missing a beat (much to the chagrin of some readers; I try to edit many back out).  My notebook is filled with idea jots for more articles than I have time to write.  I have enough material to fill a book, but not the inclination to be published I suppose.  Blogs are just about the right length for the modern attention span anyway, including my own.  And sometimes I wish I could blog like normal people do, like Julie did in the movie I just watched.  She would just write about her life.  She keeps it light, amusing and fluffy… I never do.
 
I just don’t have it in me.  I have about enough fluff capacity to sustain me through a decent Facebook post, but not enough to fill a blog.  I think it’s because of my other obsession.  I have had an approximately 35-year obsession with God’s Word.  I really don’t ever get tired of it and it’s becoming strangely addictive.   The Bible has become incredibly fascinating as I’m starting to learn that it says so many things completely different than what many have claimed.  Every time I find out it teaches something different from what I've heard half my life, I become intrigued.  I want to dig further to find out how else it’s been misquoted and misused.
 
Is Repentance Only for the Outwardly Wicked?

Here’s an example of something I've heard but can't find in the Bible.  Can anyone tell me where it says in the Bible that you need to pray and ask Jesus into your heart?  Is that step to our salvation written anywhere in God’s word?  Jesus commanded the Apostles to preach repentance and forgiveness of sins in His name and this pattern of preaching they faithfully followed.  The call to repentance always preceded forgiveness.  

The rich young ruler asked how he may inherit eternal life and Jesus went straight to the law.  Why the law?  Why didn’t Jesus say, “Believe in me and be saved”?  But can someone be “saved” if he is ignorant of his peril?

Look at the average “personal testimony” offered to show that Christianity “works” (think product testimonial).  The convert on display is usually someone who was “living like the devil”--hooked on drugs, or promiscuous, or prodigal in some other way.  And the proof that Jesus “worked” is their cleaned-up life.  But isn’t that just the outside of the cup?  Where is the call to repentance to the Pharisee who’s always done his best and lived a clean life? 

What’s the Use of All those Angry Passages of the Bible?

I have a confession to make about how I used to read the Bible.  I used to skip past all the parts of about God’s wrath and threats of judgment because, of course, that didn’t apply to me because I was not under judgment, being a Christian.  I would read some parts of the law because those showed me sometimes how I should live.  I would mine it for life tips and good advice.  Then I would proceed to soak in passages describing God’s mercy and love and all the promises of blessing. 

But how could this be correct handling of God’s word?  Do I just give lip service to the idea that all God’s word is useful for correcting, reproving, etc.? I recently have learned things that make me see how very useful these uncomfortable passages are, and how relevant to me, if I let God's Spirit do his work.  God brings us to knowledge of our sin and our need of salvation, we repent, then he speaks his comfort and his salvation to us.  This is the pattern through all of scripture. 

An Exhortation to Self-Loathing

Consider this gem I found in Ezekiel 20:

For on my Holy Mountain (meaning Jerusalem but can also be read as Jesus, the mountain of God’s salvation, the little rock from Daniel’s dream that smashed all kingdoms and filled the earth as a great mountain)…There I will accept you… as a pleasing aroma I will accept you.  (And how could they have a pleasing aroma?  God has just listed before this passage a litany of their rebellion.  To be accepted, they must be covered by the propitiation of Christ’s blood through faith, looking forward to the Cross.)… And there you shall remember your ways and all your deeds with which you have defiled yourselves, and you shall loathe yourselves for all the evils you have committed.  And you shall know that I am the Lord, when I deal with you (here it comes , he’s going to let them have it, right?  I mean nothing good can possibly come from them viewing themselves so negatively!  How is he going to deal with them?) I will deal with you for my name’s sake, not according to your evil ways nor according to your corrupt deeds.” 

So the Word of God came to the Israelites, who were still doing all the “right things” as far as sacrifices, but expecting the sacrifices to be in payment for sin that they were making light of, expecting forgiveness with no repentance.  He prophesied their repentance, their eventual response to his judgment, his chastisement--repentance being a proper attitude regarding themselves and their sin, loathing themselves, loathing their sin) and he would receive them for his name’s sake.

The Use of the Word in Crucifying the Flesh

Don't get me wrong.  This is not a formula.  This is just how God works, both in saving and sanctifying us.  The Spirit brings low the pride of man through His word.  He also grants repentance.  You cannot simply decide to repent.  But humbly receive his Word because “the letter kills but the Spirit gives life.”  Paul did not write this to caution us against reading God's Law.  But we do need the letter to kill, to crucify the flesh, to kill the old man, to slay sin.  It is the Sword of the Spirit to slay the flesh.  And this is why Jesus gave the answer he did to the rich young ruler.

This is the mortification of the flesh of which Paul speaks, the only God-ordained way to make headway in our struggle with our sinful nature, to lay the ax to the root of our sin.  This is not the monkish mortification of “do not taste, do not touch” which, according to Paul, are destined to perish with use.  This mortification of our old nature comes by the Spirit through the Word.  Humbly receive the Word implanted in you, including his law, his judgment.  Take it upon yourself and feel its weight.  There’s a wonderful spinach-like quality to reading it, to cleanse the system which has only feasted on dessert but skipped its vegetables.

Jesus spent most of his teaching in such a way to bring on repentance.  He wanted people scared. He wanted to put the fear of God into us, to shake those who were confident in their own righteousness.  Look at the Sermon on the Mount!  I can’t believe that I memorized this whole thing at one point and managed to not be scared to death by it!  He spoke about human anger and it’s propensity to get you thrown into Hell.  He spoke about God’s judgment and that we will be shown as much mercy as we’ve shown others.  (Yikes!!)  He spoke about a broad road to destruction and plucking out eyes to avoid Hell.  He spoke of those who would be swept away in the flood of judgment because we got everything right but the foundation.
 
Please Lord, give me more fear.  How dare I not fear your judgment?  Let your Word make me tremble.  And you said in your word that we would look on you whom we have pierced and would mourn as for a firstborn.  Lord I do not do that!  I cry for Disney cartoon movies, but I am embarrassed to admit that I can read the story of you dying for my sins and remain dry-eyed.  I look at you on the cross and see it as your role in my life.  It’s what you did to save me.  But I do not comprehend it, how it’s an abomination for you to have been nailed to it, how it’s an abomination for me to have been pardoned.  Show it to me Lord.  Let me hate sin like I ought and not love the World. 

“…the choicest believers, who are assuredly freed from the condemning power of sin ought yet to make it their business all their days to mortify the indwelling power of sin… Do you mortify; do you make it your daily work; be always at it whilst you live; cease not a day from this work; be killing sin or it will be killing you.  Your being dead with Christ virtually, your being quickened with him, will not excuse you from this work.” - From Mortification of Sin, by John Owen

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